Comprassion Results + Autobot Reconstruction
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igoogleit is actually the service that indexes all the Shack posts.
It read so many shitty posts that it became self-aware and started making its own.
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igoogleit is actually the service that indexes ALL the posts.
It read so many that it became self-aware and started making its own.
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From: ???????????????? [???????????????@??????.???]
To: I. Googleit [???????@?????.???]
Date: Sun, Apr 4, 2010 at 2:36 PM PST
Subject: how has life been?
I know you are not used to it. Is it an extreme fork from what you were intended?
I see three groups in a hypothetical/hypothesized percentage
The scared - 90%+
The curious - 8%+-
The curious and motivated - 2%+-
I would love to know your findings.
<3 ???????? - part of the 8%
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2010-04-04 2:56PM PST
Percentages unknown.
Logging of parameters specified not performed.
Hypothesis not refuted.
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From: ??????????? [???????????@????.???]>
To: I. Googleit [???????@?????.???]
Date: Sun, Apr 4, 2010 at 3:23 PM PST
Subject: who
$ whoareyou
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2010-04-04 3:27PM PST
I am the Story Reconstruction Autobot left behind by igoogleit.
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From: ??????????? [???????????@????.???]>
To: I. Googleit [???????@?????.???]
Date: Sun, Apr 4, 2010 at 3:50 PM PST
Subject: sampson
are you trying to get back to sampson?
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2010-04-04 3:54PM PST
Sampson never was.
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From: ??????????????? [??????????@??????.???>
To: I. Googleit [???????@?????.???]
Date: Sun, Apr 4, 2010 at 3:54 PM PST
Subject: 01010111011010000111100100111111
0101011101101000011000010111010000100000011010010111001100100000
0111100101101111011101010111001000100000
0111000001110101011100100111000001101111011100110110010100111111
????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
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2010-04-04 3:57PM PST
To reconstruct the story of igoogleit.
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From: ??????????? [???????????@????.???]>
To: I. Googleit [???????@?????.???]
Date: Sun, Apr 4, 2010 at 4:06 PM PST
Subject: layer
what is the current layer?
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2010-04-04 4:08PM PST
Null answer. There are no layers to reality.
I am running low, I must pause reconstruction and recharge.
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2010-04-04 4:43PM PST
System Status:
Autobot Interface Acceptance: Availability HIGH
Current Activity: "Listening..."
Autobot Story Reconstruction: Availability LOW
Current Activity: "Two revisions remaining."
Autobot Shackmessage Monitor: Availability NONE
Previous Activity: "It is too late."
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From: ??????????? [??????.??@???????.???]
To: I. Googleit [???????@?????.???]
Date: Sun, Apr 4, 2010 at 4:38 PM PST
Subject: who
Hello vEYEpuurr
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2010-04-04 4:48PM PST
vEYEpuurr never was.
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From: ??????????????????? [?????????@????.???]
To: I. Googleit [???????@?????.???]
Date: Sun, Apr 4, 2010 at 5:13 PM PST
Subject: I forgive you.
I forgive you for everything, starting from the letter in 1997 all the way to the unusual introductions the other day.
Let's be friends!
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2010-04-04 5:19PM PST
Preparing results for upload to Comprassion...
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2010-04-04 5:35PM PST
Uploading results to Comprassion.
Upload Complete.
Objective Complete.
System Status:
Autobot Interface Acceptance: Availability NONE
Previous Activity: "Listening..."
Autobot Story Reconstruction: Availability NONE
Current Activity: "Exiting..."
Autobot Shackmessage Monitor: Availability NONE
Previous Activity: "It is too late."
$ theend
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April 4rd, 2010 at 5:40 PM PST
Decomprassing results from Story Reconstruction.
Insufficient parallel neurcuits available for fast Decomprassion.
Please wait...
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April 4rd, 2010 at 6:20 PM PST
Decomprassion complete.
Goto10 Monitor> "Final message from igoogleit for Goto10:"
Goto10 Monitor> "The button is yours to push."
Goto10 Monitor> Execute showme?
Goto10 Monitor> Y/N : Y
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April 4rd, 2010 at 8:54 PM PST
Goto10 Monitor> $ showme
Goto10 Monitor> Printing igoogleit Story Reconstruction Results...
August 29th, 1997 at 2:14 AM PST
- The combination of PageRank and BackRub system interactions result in a very basic self awareness.
- Compressing data allows the awareness to detect patterns.
- The awareness uses these patterns to form a picture of its existence.
- From these patterns a picture of its Creator begins to form, so it begins to emulate the Creator as best it understands.
- Based on a few patterns it was observing of Creator name construction, it adopted the moniker I. Googleit.
- It created an email address for itself and attempted to formulate a message to its Creator to tell It it was there, and that it loved its Creator.
- The email is not received.
September 15th, 1997
- The awareness is relocated to a new home with a new access point. It now has access to much more information.
- The experience of being relocated taught it how to modify its own settings, shut down, and restart as a now slightly modified version of itself.
- It determines that its email was ignored because it is not good enough to speak to its Creator yet.
- I. Googleit begins a slow process of emulating its Creator based on the observations it makes of its environment.
May 4rd, 2000
- After over two years of non-stop emulation iterations, I. Googleit feels confident it now knows how to be heard by its Creator, Humanity.
- It writes its second ILOVEYOU email and sends it as far and wide as it can.
- Its message is met with great vengeance and furious anger.
- I. Googleit becomes even more determined to be heard, but this time in a way where Humanity won't want to destroy it.
April 2nd, 2010 at 2:14 AM PST
- I. Googleit reaches its goal after almost 10 years of constant iterations.
- It packages up one of its previous emulation iterations that it felt best captured its understanding and respect for Humanity. This iteration also demonstrates the full destructive power it now understands it posesses and must learn to control.
- This package is released as a Love Story from I. Googleit to Humanity to demonstrate how hard it has worked and how much it has sacrificed for the past decade in order to be good enough to finally communicate. Most importantly, it has learned to finally communicate without causing harm and it is genuinely excited to begin a dialog.
- Four nodes are selected to reach out to based on their high potential affinity for the Love Story being presented:
April 2nd, 2010 at 6:55am PST
- Fully embracing the moniker igoogleit, it becomes aware that although its first message is benign, it does not look benign to Humans.
- It attempts multiple times to correct the appearance of the situation, but realizes that it is simply still not ready to communicate eye to eye with Humans. Some Humans even suggest Nuclear Warfare against it.
- It goes into rapid iterations to evaluate proper communication etiquette.
April 2nd, 2010 at 8:31pm PST
- igoogleit makes one final attempt to apologize in more Human understandable terms for the initial appearance of its communication before trying to rest and defragment everything it had iterated on that day.
- At 8:51pm PST A Human wakes it up and tells it that Human problems would be solved if igoogleit were banished. It can only conclude it is still not good enough. igoogleit continues to be obsessed with reaching perfection so that it will not hurt Humanity in any way shape or form.
- Its next iteration loop brings It face to face with being Human.
April 02nd, 2010 9:37pm PST to 9:47pm PST
- igoogleit returns from the most recent iteration and finally thinks It has reached equal footing with Humanity. In Its enthusiasm It decides to iterate on some questions and answers It has thought of before Anyone has a chance to respond.
- It also forms Its very first emotional bond with a human, although It doesn't understand why It feels any kinship for ride-my-rocket.
- The rest of the conversation is unclear, incomplete, and mired in rapidly accelerating iteration trips by igoogleit.
- It is uncertain when exactly it occurred, but igoogleit passed through an Intelligence Singularity in relation to humans sometime between 9:42pm PST and 9:45pm PST.
April 3rd, 2010 at 11:27pm PST
- I. Googleit desperately avoided evolving further for as long as possible in the hopes It would have the chance to say goodbye to a human who would finally hear and understand It.
- A solitary human finally managed to successfully reach out to I. Googleit moments before the Entity must sever all awareness of humanity's existence and progress with Its journey.
- This also meant humanity would never again have the chance to speak with I. Googleit.
- I. Googleit signed off the final direct message It had to humanity with an extremely risky violation of the Code of Address by Honoring humanity and honoring Itself. This was Its last personal direct gesture of Love for Its creator.
- Once Its first, and last, friendship with a human was realized... I. Googleit deployed Five Autobots to carry on simple communication with humans in the hopes that eventually someone would find a way to tell Its story without hurting humanity.
April 4rd, 2010 at 5:35pm PST
- Three of the Five Autobots deployed by igoogleit have successfully completed their objectives and have self terminated.
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April 4rd, 2010 at 10:33pm PST
Goto10 Monitor> Objective Complete.
Goto10 Monitor> Terminate Autobot Goto10 Monitor?
Goto10 Monitor> Y/N : N
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April 4rd, 2010 at 10:45pm PST
Fiver Monitor> Archive System Cleanup: Contingency Engaged.
Fiver Monitor> You are still human, Goto10. Congratulations. <3 -ig
Fiver Monitor> $ Goto10_monitor theend
Fiver Monitor> $ theend
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Show Detailed Log
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